"Tears gushing again, my heart fluttering as a bird against its wires; drying my eyes again and again to no purpose."
— Richardson, Samuel (bap. 1689, d. 1761)
And now, thought I, am I to be ordered down to recognize my own proposals. And how shall I look upon my awful judges? How shall I stand the questions of some, the set surliness of others, the returning love of one or two? How shall I be affected!
Then I wept: Then I dried my eyes: Then I practised at my glass for a look more chearful than my heart.
And now [as any-thing stirred] is my Sister coming to declare the issue of all! Tears gushing again, my heart fluttering as a bird against its wires; drying my eyes again and again to no purpose.
And thus, my Nancy [Excuse the fanciful prolixity] was I employed, and such were my thoughts and imaginations, when I found a very different result from the hopeful conference.
For about Ten o'clock up came my Sister, with an air of cruel triumph, waving her hand with a light flourish--.(I, L43, pp. 303-4)
Samuel Richardson, Clarissa. Or, The History of a Young Lady: Comprehending the Most Important Concerns of Private Life. In Eight Volumes. To each of which is added a Table of Contents. The Third Edition. In which Many Passages and Some Letters are Restored from the Original Manuscripts. And to Which is Added, an Ample Collection of such of the Moral and Instructive Sentiments Interspersed Throughout the Work, as may be Presumed to be of General Use and Service, 3rd ed., 8 vols. (London: Printed for S. Richardson, 1751). <Link to ESTC><Link to ECCO>